What Teaching Feels Like

I haven't talked much about my time here as an educator because I write weekly reflections, lesson reflections, discuss it at school, and well let's face it, most of you really REALLY couldn't care less about the day to day classroom life of Miss Vincent.  But today was an awesome day for me, so I thought I would share.

The past three weeks I have been teaching full time and by the end of all of it I had this lingering headache.  Going on three days of what I am now affectionately calling, my teaching hangover.  I have been working hard to prove myself as an educator, and to be the best teacher I possibly can for my students.  Most lessons I know I could bring a little more, do a little better.  Some lessons I completely fail, but every now and then there is a day that makes me grateful to be a teacher.

Today my students gave speeches to finish out a unit we have been doing for a month.  I have taught and planned the entire thing on my own.  Of course checking in with the department for help and clarification along the way.  Half of them had been in after school at some point to work with me and I have spent weeks working with each of them to help them clarify and articulate their ideas.  My students got up in front of their peers today and spoke about personal and difficult issues.  The spoke about the expectations of not showing emotion that young men face, the difficulties of being an introvert, growing up facing racial injustices and low expectations, abortions, judgments,  the struggles and confusion of teenage years, and a slew of other topics important to them.  It was clear to me that the way our classroom culture developed created a space where they felt safe to speak about things that were important to them, and share a part of themselves.  During the process of these speeches I have gotten to have wonderful and meaningful conversations with them about life, and what they thought and valued.  It was incredible to finally feel like the things that drew me to teaching English were actually possible in the classroom.

For so long I have been frustrated with the lack of connection I was feeling with students.  I love working with youth, and helping kids grow and be more confident in themselves.  I have had amazing opportunities to do this kind of work at camps and in after-school programs, but I have always longed for it in the classroom.  Today was amazing for me.  This is what I am meant to do.  I am a teacher!